Little Bunny Voldie
by Kadasa-Mori
Summary: A bunny suit, a mental author who has had too much caffiene and Voldemort. What craziness will befall the wizarding world? OneShot


**Little Bunny Voldie**

**By: KadasaMori**

The scene opens up with a bunny standing in the middle of a clearing. Upon closer inspection, we find that the bunny is actually a person dressed up as a bunny, only his face visible behind the big pink fluffy rabbit costume.

His pale face is crossed between a death glare and a nervous look, trying to see if anyone can see him and his red eyes are narrowed in anger and panic.

Upon further analysis, we find that said person-in-bunny-costume, is a wanted wizard by the name of Voldemort a.k.a. Tom Riddle a.k.a. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named a.k.a. You-Know-Who (which we don't), a.k.a. the Dark Lord a.k.a. lots of other names.

All in all, not a nice guy.

So why is he dressed in a bunny suit we asked the author?

Because said author is slightly more than insane, has had too much caffeine, and the mental image of Voldie in a bunny costume makes her laugh hysterically.

Now on with the story.

_(Author clears throat)_

_Little Bunny Voldie was hopping through the forest. _

When said bunny doesn't move, author scowls.

_I said, little bunny voldie was hopping through the forest!_

"How dare you treat I, Lord Voldemort, with such disrespect! I demand that you take this infernal thing off right this instant!"

When author pretends not to hear him he starts to struggle and try to tear costume off, only to fall over when big bunny feet trip him.

_(laughs hysterically before righting bunn)) Now let's try this again. Little bunny Voldie wa-_

"Woman! Take this off me now!"

_(sticks out tongue) Don't wanna._

"Foolish wench! Once I regain my fellow Death Eaters and my wand I shall destroy you!"

_I'm the author. You can't._

"Can!"

_Can't!_

"Can!"

_Can't!_

"CAN SO!" Bunny takes a step forward and falls on his face, fluffy tail bouncing from the impact. He pulls himself up off the ground. "Get me out of this suit woman!" He yelled, dirt covering his face.

_(Author grins.) No. Now, (rights Bunny once more) Can we get on with our story? You've already delayed an entire page! Little Bunny-_

"NO! I refuse to partake in such activities as this!"

_Big words from a bunny. You will partake… now._

"Can't make me."

_Look Bunny. It's either this or a tutu. Your choice._

Pales even more than his normal skin color. "You wouldn't dare."

.  
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(A/N: Please forgive randomness...)

DING DONG!

Harry Potter yawned as he headed to the front door of 4 Privet Drive. As he opened the door he asked "hello?"

He blinked realizing there was no one there then looked down. An envelope sat there. He plucked it up off the ground and shut the door behind him.

"Who was it boy?" His uncle Vernon called from the living room.

"No one was there."

"Probably some prank Vernon," his Aunt Petunia hissed, getting up and looking out the window. He grunted his agreement and returned to the TV show.

Harry headed upstairs to his room and shut his door, tugging the envelope open. He pulled out a square piece of paper. He turned it around.

His emotions varied starting off with confused as to who the picture showed, then slight disgust, then hysterical laughter.

He managed to pull his wand out and mutter a spell to copy the photo before sending it to all of his friends.

.  
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.  
.  
.

The said person was trying to tear off his tutu, only managing to fall over several times from the effort. He kept glaring at the sky, where the author was rolling in hysterical laughter.

"ALL RIGHT!" He suddenly bellowed. "I'LL DO IT!"

(_Author grins widely and transforms tutu to bunny suit then clears throat)_

_Little Bunny Voldie was hopping through the forest,_

Said bunny begins to hop through the trees.

_Snatching up the wizards,_

Toy wizard appears on ground and he snatches him up.

_And bopping them on the head._

Bunny grins evilly and starts pounding on doll wizard's head.

_Down came the good wizard,_

Albus Dumbledore appears out of nowhere smiling like always.

"Augh!" Voldemort recoils. "Not him! Anybody but him!"

"Hello there Tom!" Dumbledore chirps and holds out a small wrapped lemon drop. "Care for a lemon drop?"

"N-no thanks…" Voldemort twitches at the use of his name.

_Dumbledore! You're supposed to say something!_

Dumbledore smiles. "Oh yes. I am." Clears throat. "Tom, I am your father!"

Silence.

More silence.

Even more silence.

Voldemort slowly falls over.

_Author starts laughing hysterically and also falls over, rolling unlike the unconscious dark lord._

_I am…HAHAHAHA… your father…HAHAHAHA… too good!_

"…" Voldemort's unconscious from the shock.

"Oh wait… sorry. Wrong story."

Author eventually stops laughing and pours a bucket of water on Voldemort who groans and sits up.

"Please tell me you're kidding."

"Yes, yes," Dumbledore, still smiling. "All in good humor."

Voldemort lets out a sigh of relief.

_Dumbledore… your lines?_

"Oh yes. Tom, I'd like it if you'd stop picking up-" 

_- snatching -_

"-snatching up the doll wizards and hitting-"

­_-bopping-_

"-bopping them on the head. I'm giving you three more chances."

"Whatever."

"Would you like a lemon drop?"

Voldemort rolls his eyes skyward and Dumbledore disappears.

_Little Bunny Voldie was hopping through the forest,_

Voldemort begins hopping.

_Snatching up the wizards,_

Picks up a doll wizard.

_And bopping them on the head._

Voldemort raises his fist then stops. "Wait. Dumbledore told me not to."

_Since when have you listened to him?_

Voldemort pauses then nods. "Good point." Begins to pummel doll into the afterlife.

_Down came the good wizard,_

Dumbledore appears with a sigh. "Tom…"

"What?"

Holds out his hand. "Would you like a lemon drop?"

"No."

_Dumbledore! Your lines!_

"Oh yes… the one ring, TO RULE THEM ALL!"

_No-no-no!_

"Ooooo… rule them all?"

"Oops. Wrong line again. Uh… Tom, I'd like it if you'd stop snatching up the doll wizards and bopping them on the head. I'm giving you two more chances."

"No ring?"

_NO! Dumbledore, go way._

He disappears.

_Little Bunny Voldie was hopping through the forest._

Sighs but begins hopping again.

Snatching up the wizards, 

Picks up the doll wizard.

_And bopping them on the head._

Starts bopping the doll wizards on the head.

_Down came the good wizard,_

Dumbledore appears in front of them. "Does anybody want-"

"NO!"

"Okay…"

Silence.

_Dumbledore…_

"Oh yes." Clears throat.

Silence.

More silence.

Even more silence.

"BELCH!"

"Ewwww!"

_Ewwww!_

Dumbledore grinned. "Better out than in I always say!"

"I knew you were crazy you old bat!"

_This is Little Bunny Voldie! Not Shrek!_

"Oh yes. Wrong lines. Yes… uh… oh yeah! Tom, stop snatching up the wizards and bopping them on the head. One more chance. Would anyone like a-"

Disappears before he can finish the question.

_Little Bunny Voldie was hopping through the forest._

Begins hopping again.

"You know, this is getting old."

_Tutu…_

"And I'm having a grand ol time!" Adds with a nervous grin.

Good. Continue.  
Snatching up the wizards, 

Picks up the doll wizard.

_And bopping them on the head._

Starts bopping the doll wizards on the head.

_Down came the good wizard,_

Voldemort groans as Dumbledore appears in front of them then starts to get nervous as the angry look on the wizard's face.

"Tom! I've given you three chances!" Dark cloud begins to rumble behind him.

"It's not my fault!" Voldemort shouts. "I didn't want to! The author made me!"

Clouds disperse. "Oh… well then…"

(A/N: If you haven't seen Potter Puppet Pals you won't get this at all)

"Nakey music!" Music starts. "Nakey dance!" Throws off cloak.

"AUGH! MY EYES!"

_Author slaps forehead and shakes her head._

Dumbledore tosses his arms skyward and lemon drops being pouring down like rain. "Lemon drops for everyone!"

_I knew this wouldn't end well…_

And so we end our story with our author sighing and leaving a Dumbledore dancing naked in a storm of lemon drops, and a Voldemort crying out at the image stuck in his mind, slowly being covered in the yellow sweets, unknowing to the fact that he is now becoming the laughing stock in the wizarding world because of the photo of him in a tutu

Moral of the story?

Too much caffeine causes extreme chaos and danger to mental health for the wizarding world.

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Yeah… I was kind of hyper when I made this… but it makes me laugh. (giggles to prove point)

Okay. If you don't get the nakey dance at all, do this now:

1 – Go to "www-dot-potterpuppetpals-dot-com"

2 – Click on "Bothering Snape."

3 – Watch

4 – Understand!

Yay!

Okies. I have to go have some more sugar! Bye!

**- Kadasa Mori -**


End file.
